Restoring Balance, First Internally, Then Externally
By Jacob Dwyer
In WordView, we explore the hidden meanings, stories and implications words have for us through group discussion to better understand ourselves and others. On April 14, we explored balance - what does it mean for us, what does it mean in our lives, and is it truly achievable?
What comes to mind when we think of balance?
In starting the conversation, we thought about the different ways in which we relate balance to our lives. Balance reminds us of the ways in which we aim to achieve a sense of equilibrium in our lives. Work-life balance came to mind as a common axiom in today’s professional world. In our relationships with the environment, we seek balance in terms of what we consume and preserve. In an age of polarization and disinformation around the world, the question of how to achieve balance in media, particularly the often evidence-lacking annals of social media, continues to perplex. Similar difficulties arise in thinking about how to achieve balance during conversations around race, gender, and class, when institutional power imbalances dynamically skew the scales one way or another. In referencing these experiences, we noted how often concepts of balance enter into our everyday lives, and yet are often still outside of our ability to achieve.
What is balance?
The prevalence of balance in our lives subsequently led us to explore the term itself further. We understood balance as the notion that multiple forces, often in opposition to one another, reach a point of equilibrium. This point of equilibrium is often also associated with notions of harmony, as it denotes that everything is ‘in order.’ Balance can exist in distinct moments of time, such as in balancing the speaking time of different participants, or across large spans of time, such as in the spiritual notion of cause and effect known as karma. Balance can exist between two opposing forces, such as in the binary of yin and yang, or between multiple forces, such as in balancing the various roles and responsibilities each of us hold. However, as noted in our personal examples of moments where we seek balance, we often feel things are ‘out of balance,’ so we explored how restoring this balance could be achieved.
Quangpraha at pixabay
How can we restore balance?
In seeking to restore balance, we decided it’s important to look internally first. We will only have balance in our external lives when we have balance internally. This is not as easy as it may seem, as one of the most difficult steps is understanding ourselves. However, in understanding ourselves, we can better understand how to navigate toward a better balance of the myriad forces in our lives. In thinking this further, we turned to the currently popular concept of work-life balance. For some of us, we found work to be life-giving and not in opposition to our lives, thereby invalidating the concept for us. The concept also misses other aspects of our lives, such as relationships and responsibilities, that may present stress. Instead of focusing on this binary, we determined it best to look at sources of joy and balance these against the many stresses that all of us run across. As an added benefit, in exploring the multitude of ways in which balance can be achieved for ourselves, we also begin to see past traditional black-white binaries and identify the gray forms of balance that may exist for others - a crucial first step in compassionately supporting others in achieving their form of balance.
Another option for restoring balance internally is reminding ourselves of what is, and is not, within our control. For one participant, balance is universal and, whether through natural forces or some higher power, balance will be achieved. So, if you are slighted, you do not need to respond as they will receive their consequence in due time. Instead, it is important to focus on what you can do - greet others with compassion, seek internal balance for ourselves, and stand up for our values. Some participants found this mindset particularly helpful when thinking about seemingly immovable institutionalized power structures, like racism, misogyny and classism. While it may seem like nothing is changing, in the longer-term the injustices have to balance toward a more equitable world. In the meantime, we focus on what we can do in pursuit of that ideal, and entrust the universe to deliver.
Is balance good?
Whenever we come across words with positive and negative connotations, it is imperative we think critically about why this meaning is held. Often, the positive or negative meaning arises from white colonialist narratives perpetuated to marginalize and dehumanize others. So, it was imperative to also ask if balance is good. In balance, whenever presented with a binary, it is always important to be cautious. As we had discussed, life is full of gray. When we only perceive in black and white, we miss much of the nuance that can inform our actions and decisions with the world around us. It also narrows our perspective into artificial categories that often serve to devalue someone’s perspective. However, it is often our tendency to ignore this gray, as complexity makes perceiving the world more difficult. So, it is not balance in of itself, but rather our simplification of balance, that can lead us astray. As balance becomes a buzzword, it is important for us to remember this gray - the many ways in which balance can exist for us all. And perhaps, in understanding the many forms of balance that may exist, we can implement methods of fostering balance that are inclusive and sustainable for all.